One of life's terrible facts is that dominant women prefer to attract meek guys. As a result, if you have a domineering mother, you are more likely to have a passive father as your major male role model. The study also found that fathers who were treated like dirt by their mothers grew up to be men who were often afraid to stand up for themselves.
Mothers can influence the direction their children take through their own behavior as well as through what they say. If your mother is aggressive and demanding, you will probably find fault with yourself whenever you make a mistake or fail to live up to someone's expectations of you. You will feel inadequate and guilty even when there is no one else around to judge you. This environment will create a boy who is shy and sensitive.
However, if your mother is loving and supportive, she will help you learn how to deal with failure and defeat. She will also encourage you to follow your heart and not worry about what others think of you. This type of son will grow up to be confident and courageous.
The quality of a parent's love is reflected in the way they treat their children. A domineering mother may show her affection for you by yelling at you to get your attention. She may even hit you to make herself feel better after being rejected by her first choice for marriage.
An uneasy attachment is always created by a dominating mother. In a relationship where the male kid has not been emotionally validated, he will frequently exhibit aggressive or antagonistic conduct. This is a feature that separates them from the female children of domineering moms. The boy will try to assert himself by being bossy or rebellious, so as not to be hurt again.
He may also develop a need for power and control. This can lead him to become an authoritarian parent himself, who abuses his own kids just like his mom did to him. Or he may turn to drugs or alcohol to escape from his feelings.
The impact of an overbearing mother on her son can be seen in his relationships with women. He will usually look for a mother figure who treats him with respect, because he does not want to be hurt again. This might cause him to marry too early, move in with his girlfriend or boyfriend before they get married, which is not good for their emotional health.
If he becomes a father himself, he will probably show the same traits that were present in him when he was young. If there is no other maternal figure in his life, then he will have to learn how to take care of others, which is not easy since it requires being humble first and foremost.
If you had a dominating mother, you probably likely had a passive father, which is a bad mix for a man's self-esteem. Here's how to get better. Toggle Navigation Project Information Graham's Life Story I struggled from a persistent lack of self-confidence from early infancy until the most of my adult life. Although I did not know it at the time, this condition was very common among people with controlling mothers and passive fathers.
Controlling mothers tend to be overbearing, critical, and often unreasonable. They may insist on doing things their way, even if they aren't reasonable. This can really hurt your confidence if you're not used to being told what to do.
Controlling mothers may also punish you by making you feel bad about yourself if you don't meet their expectations. For example, if you don't get good grades, you won't be allowed to go out late at night, or you'll be punished by having some of your favorite toys taken away. This can really damage your sense of security if you rely on these objects to feel good about yourself.
Finally, controlling mothers tend to make their own decisions without asking you first. For example, they might move away from you if they feel like it would be best for you. This could happen even if you want them to stay with you.
All these factors together have created a world for me that was extremely uncomfortable where I felt inadequate almost all the time.
The following are common causes for the mother-in-dominating law's behavior: When a mother-in-law believes she is losing her role as the major lady in her son's life, she becomes bossy and devious. In such a case, the mother-in-law feels compelled to exert control over her son and his marriage.
Also, when a mother-in-law feels her daughter-in-law isn't giving her proper respect, she will use her power incorrectly to get it. For example, if a mother-in-law thinks her daughter-in-law isn't showing her love by visiting often enough or not at all, she might punish her by refusing to take her side in arguments or by reporting her behavior to her husband. This gives the father reason to dislike his daughter-in-law and not visit with her either.
Finally, a mother-in-law can be controlling because of personal issues. If she was never given attention or love as a child, she will try to make up for it by controlling others too late in life. Such a woman might criticize her son's wife for doing things the way she did as a girl (i.e., walk around the house wearing makeup) instead of accepting that she's an adult now with different needs.
Women need to understand that no matter how much they love their sons or daughters-in-law, they cannot control them.
A demanding mother will not be content unless you do things her way. If you recall being chastised for the things you wore or the way you spoke, your mother was attempting to exert control over you. Many elderly people may claim that they only wanted the best for their children when, in reality, they were attempting to control every aspect of their life.
Some dominated or controlled spouses have had enough and chose not to put up with it any longer. They took a position and said unequivocally that if things did not change, the marriage will end shortly. Others developed an emotional attachment to someone who treated them with decency and respect.
Here are some of the most prevalent characteristics of controlling parents: Obeyance and compliance are demanded. Allow youngsters no participation in or questioning of their parents' decisions. Do not allow their children to make their own choices. 7 days have passed. What has happened to Nancy?
The controlling parent may give his or her child freedom at first, but soon takes it away again. This cycle continues until the child reaches adulthood.
Controlling parents try to control everything about their children's lives. They decide what schools they can go to, who their friends will be, how they should act, and what they should do with their free time.
Children of controlling parents feel powerless over almost everything except their family finances. Because they believe that they cannot make any decisions on their own, they tend to avoid taking risks and often play it safe. This prevents them from experiencing many different things in life but most especially in the teenage years when they start to explore who they are and what they want to do with their lives.
Often these children grow up to be unhappy individuals who lack self-confidence. They may even think that they are unworthy of love and respect because they do not consider themselves responsible for their actions.
It is very important for children of controlling parents to understand that they are not responsible for what happens to them as teenagers or adults.