Relationship Expert and Appropriate Introduction "If they did it to others, they will do it to you," stated Chief Matchmaker Linda Prescott. Relationships founded on falsehoods, more often than not, do not continue merely because of the way they began. There are two main reasons why these relationships fail: because they aren't built on honesty and respect, or because one or both parties change for the worse over time.
An honest relationship is based on trust and truthfulness. Without honesty, there can be no real love nor loyalty. Lying is an indicator that there is no longer any integrity in the relationship. You should also consider how someone would treat you if they didn't respect you. Would they lie about you? If so, you shouldn't expect them to be truthful about anything else.
Falling in love is great. It's natural to want to share your most intimate secrets with someone you love. However, if you find yourself telling lies about your past to make your partner feel comfortable, then you should probably rethink the relationship. Lying is a sign that there is something wrong with this connection. If you don't like how someone treats you, you should look for someone who does. Don't try to make yourself feel better by lying about things you know will hurt him or her.
It is normal to want to belong to something special and true.
Someone in the audience at one of my speeches, whether a conversation partner or a student, will say that they never lie. Even more intriguing, some will swear not to speak any lies for the following many weeks. Serious lies—the big-time betrayals of trust—are generally never beneficial for any form of relationship. So it's safe to assume that relationships can't survive without some type of deception.
Lies are like air; we need them to breathe. Without them, life would be very uncomfortable if not impossible. Relationships require honesty to function properly. If one party is always lying to the other, then no matter how strong the bond, it will always be damaged by this lack of truthfulness.
In order for there to be truth between two people, there needs to be trust. Trust is vital to any relationship, especially one built on lies. Without it, nothing good can grow between two people. Even though we may want to protect those we love by keeping secrets from them, it's important to understand that this only hurts them in the end. The ones we care about deserve better than this. They deserve someone who will stand by them through anything and everything.
As long as there is love between two people, they can stay together through good times and bad. It's when that love starts to fade away that things become difficult. When you stop feeling love for your partner, that's when you should think about changing things around.
According to Durvasula, people lie in relationships to preserve face, prevent confrontation, defend their egos, maintain their image, and simply to avoid hurting their partner's feelings. Making a practice of lying, on the other hand, isn't beneficial for your relationship in general. "It has the potential to destroy it," Durvasula warns.
Lying is an important part of any relationship, but if you want to survive over time, it must be done carefully. Lying can be used to protect someone's ego, hide wrongdoing, or make them feel better about themselves. It can also be used to deceive others about plans for breaking up, to avoid arguments, or to get what you want. However, if you use these methods often enough, you will come to realize that your partner is lying to you. Then what?
If you find yourself in this situation, it may be time to call it quits. Lying is a sign that something is wrong with your relationship, and it is important to address these issues before they become problems.
People lie for many different reasons, some obvious while others not so much. If you are interested in knowing why someone has lied to you, ask directly rather than guessing. It is important that you understand where your partner is coming from when they lie to you; only then can you hope to fix the problem.