Yes, it's difficult to remember that, and yes, it's difficult not to retreat to one's darkest anxieties, but if there was ever a moment to be the greatest version of oneself, it's now—and I'm not just talking sartorially.
In some ways, dressing like your ex can be a good thing. If they liked simple styles with lots of color, go for it! If they were into trendy things, stick with what worked for them then too. The point is, don't worry about copying someone else's style exactly; instead, use this as an opportunity to express yourself through your clothing.
Of course, there are other factors at work here than just wanting to look like your ex. Dressing the way you feel can help heal old wounds from past relationships or simply allow you to move on. If you admire someone's style, you could try to copy it (but only if you like their clothes)!
The most important thing is that you're feeling comfortable in what you're wearing. If you want to send a message with your outfit, go for it! But first, trust your instincts; sometimes we forget how our own feelings affect others, but knowing these feelings even just a little bit can give you great power when choosing what to wear.
Accept that you are not entirely yourself due of your vulnerable status. Remove yourself entirely from this manipulative ex who has caused you so much anguish. Spending time alone reminiscing about the wonderful moments should be avoided. Doubting oneself leads to stagnation and self-doubt. Which is exactly what your ex wants.
Instead, focus on moving forward with your life and learning from your past mistakes. This will help you grow as a person and give you the strength you need to face up to future challenges.
Your ex may try and convince you that you're crazy for breaking up with him. He might threaten to drag you back into court or report you for emotional abuse. It's important that you don't pay any attention to these threats. They are just tools used by your ex to manipulate you. You deserve better than being treated this way. If he reports you to the police then so be it. You've done nothing wrong and there are courts that can decide how to deal with this type of situation.
It's normal to feel sad, angry, and hurt after experiencing emotional abuse. However, if you don't take action soon enough, other emotions may also arise such as guilt, regret, or shame. Don't worry about feeling these things. What matters most at this moment is that you look after your own needs first. Focus on your recovery and know that you are not alone.
Trombetti thinks it's OK to fall back in love with your ex if circumstances change, but she also reminds us that "you cut things off for a reason." Don't let your emotions take over and lead you back to where you were before the split. Think of this as another chance for both you and your ex to learn something new.
The most important thing is that you don't try to force anything. Let time do its work and give yourself time to heal too. If you act too soon, you may make things worse instead of better.
Here are some other points to consider: Would your current partner be willing to accept your feelings for your ex? Would your ex want you to feel this way about him or her today? Would your ex even agree that things have changed? These questions should help you figure out what you're feeling and why.
Once you understand these things, you can start to move forward.