Do you know the status of your relationship on Valentines Day?

Do you know the status of your relationship on Valentines Day?

Dating is just not as prevalent as it once was, and sadly for Generation Y, we are lucky if we even know the state of our present relationships. Valentine's Day might be stressful if you don't know whether you and your "other" are simply talking, friends with benefits, or unintentionally exclusive. According to a study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 40% of men and 30% of women admit to having an affair during their marriage. If you're part of this number, you're not alone. It is estimated that 20 million Americans are involved in some type of infidelity relationship.

The study also found that men in these affairs tend to be more emotionally unavailable than their married counterparts. They were more likely to report feeling disconnected from their partners and less interested in what they had to say. This seems like an obvious point, but people in adulterous relationships need to realize that they are committing adultery no matter how much they might want to deny it. Adultery is a choice that has serious consequences including loss of reputation, divorce, and sometimes criminal charges. If you aren't ready to end your affair yet, then stop seeing your partner as a friend and start treating them like someone you intend to hurt.

It's important to remember that marriages are difficult things to maintain, especially when money is an issue.

Is your boyfriend automatically your valentine?

When someone says you're their "valentine," they're merely selecting you as the person to whom they'd want to express their affection on that special day. When persons are married or dating, it is considered that they are the other person's valentine by virtue of their romantic connection. However, since Valentine's Day was created by a commercial company, not all partners enjoy this privilege.

The term "valentine" comes from the French word "valencon," which means "to love." It may seem like a coincidence that the day we call "Valentine's Day" happens to be when many people express their love for others, but it isn't. The custom began in Europe where merchants would give gifts to shoppers on February 14th to encourage them to spend more money.

In America, the holiday became associated with romance and chocolate after popular writer William Shakespeare invented Valentines Day in 1537. Today, millions of cards are sent to lovers around the world on that single day.

But why limit yourself to just one card on February 14th? You can send multiple cards if you want. Or better yet, write a poem or song!

Can you have more than one Valentine?

If You're Single: Spend time with the individuals you care about if you don't have a significant partner. Everyone, not just couples, may enjoy the day. Bottom line: regardless of your relationship status, DO exchange a valentine with your family and friends (we did it as kids, so why stop now?).

If You're In A Relationship: Focus on your partner's qualities instead of comparing yourself to others. The most effective way to show love is by showing the person in your life that you care about what they think and feel.

Valentines Day originated as an attempt by the Catholic Church to promote love among Christians and increase church attendance. Since then it has become a commercial holiday focused on romance.

The story behind Valentines Day begins in 14th century France when Pope Paul II ordered the clergy to distribute pamphlets containing poems written by their members who were asked to write about their feelings for another. On February 14th, 1478, a priest named Pierre Valerian published the first of these poems called "Cantos" ("Songs"). He was subsequently beatified by Pope Pius IX in 1866.

Since then, several adaptations of Cantos have been made by different authors. One of the most popular versions was written by Robert Burns in 1788 where he included his own poems next to those of other people.

About Article Author

Deborah Hurt

Deborah Hurt is a licensed therapist who specializes in relationships. She believes that being able to have healthy, fulfilling relationships is the key to a happy life. Deborah understands how difficult it can be to navigate these complicated waters and loves to help people do so with compassion and understanding.

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