"State how much you appreciate spending time with him or her and getting to know him or her, and how much you'd like to spend more quality time together." Rhodes agrees, but advises beginning with some self-reflection to ensure you understand what you're asking for and why. Examine what you truly require and what is bugging you. Are you looking to be engaged in exciting activities all the time? Perhaps you want your partner to talk about himself or herself more.
If you can't figure out what it is you need, then don't expect someone else to guess. The best way to get what you want is by clearly stating your needs and desires. If you want your partner to spend more time with you then be specific about it. Say things like, "I would really love it if we could go on a weekend trip," or "It would mean the world to me if you told me about your day." Don't be afraid to be bold; only say what's true for you.
Once you've figured out what you want, give clear instructions on how to achieve it. If you want your partner to spend more time with you then make sure you are clear and concise when giving directions. For example, you could say, "When you call me, even if it's just for five minutes, I will listen without interruption until you tell me what's going on in your life."
Don't be surprised if your request is not met right away.
Spending time together is not a terrible thing in and of itself. It's only that it raises the likelihood of being irritated with someone. The more time you spend together, the more minor irritants will arise. Here's my rule of thumb for how much time you should spend with a good buddy. If you can't laugh about it, if you start to feel tense or anxious when you are together, then you're spending too much time.
The American Institute of Stress has reported that stress levels among adults have increased over the last decade. This increase has been attributed to many factors including longer working hours, less time with family members, and an increasing number of responsibilities.
It has been shown that stress can have a negative effect on your health. Irritation caused by stress can lead to depression, so if you're finding that you're spending a lot of time with someone who makes you feel depressed or anxious, then maybe you need to spend less time with them.
Spending too much time with someone can also cause problems in your relationship. If you are always annoyed with your partner, if you start to take their behaviors personally, if you begin to trust them not to hurt you... then you have gone too far.
If you want to change this habit, you need to first acknowledge that it is a problem.
Quality time with your wife or girlfriend may be as easy as making an effort to remain involved in each other's life, including talking about each other's wishes, hopes, objectives, and hobbies, rather than doing the traditional thing of sitting on a sofa and watching TV. You can keep things interesting by taking turns choosing what movie you would like to watch, or by planning activities that will allow you to have fun together.
Spend some time alone Every now and then you should try spending some time alone. This doesn't mean that she doesn't care for you, but instead, give her some space so that both of you can breathe a little. She might not know it, but she needs this time too!
Take a trip together If you want to show your wife or girlfriend that you appreciate her, take her with you when you go on trips. Not only will this give you both a chance to have some fun together, but it also demonstrates that you value her opinion.
Do something active Together, you can show how much you love her by trying new activities. For example, if you both enjoy hiking, go for a walk or take advantage of the local trails. Or maybe you both like dancing, why not plan to go out dancing once a week? Whatever you choose to do, make sure you have fun and don't worry about who is going to pay for things.