Disagreeing is normal, and reconciling differences is necessary. Fighting isn't necessary. It's what people do when they lack the emotional skills or maturity to handle differences--or when they are equipped but suffer a momentary loss of emotional control. The speaker says he "sunned it with smiles" and "and with soft, deceitful wiles." This means he is creating an illusion with his enemy by saying he is pretending to be friendly to seduce and bring him closer. These were magic arts used by ancient warriors to deceive their enemies.
It's not bad that you and your boyfriend never argue. But it may indicate that you two need some time apart to think about how you both feel about certain things. Arguing shows that you have strong feelings on either side of a topic and needs to be resolved before it causes more damage than good. However, this doesn't mean that you can't have healthy disagreements with one another.
In fact, arguing helps us understand each other better and make our relationship stronger. Only after we've argued about something can we go to bed at night knowing that we've talked everything out and been able to resolve any issues that might have arisen.
So, while fighting isn't always bad, there are times where it is necessary to resolve an issue that has you both upset. Make sure that you only fight when it's best for the relationship, not because you two want to hurt each other.
Fighting, when managed correctly, may really strengthen your relationship. You will never address your problems if you never fight or talk about them. You may develop a deeper knowledge of your relationship and find a solution that works for both of you by dealing with problems constructively. Fighting can be fun, too!
The key is not to let the fighting damage your relationship. If you do start arguing often or using violence toward each other, then no matter how good the fights seem when they first begin, they will only hurt your relationship later on.
It's best to leave your fighting up to me so I can solve our issues without hurting either of you. Sometimes though, there are some things that just can't be resolved between just the two of us, such as when one of you needs to say something serious...
In these cases, I would recommend that you fight together but separately. This way you can each say your piece without being heard by the other person. At the end of the day, you and your partner are still fighting together, but neither of you can hear what the other is saying.
This makes sense especially if one of you is angry and the other wants to calm him/herself before talking again. As long as you're careful not to act on your feelings during this time, you should be able to resolve the issue quickly without damaging the relationship.
If two individuals never argue, it typically signifies that one of them isn't being honest about his or her feelings, ideas, or thoughts and is adapting too much for the other person. This is not an indication of a healthy relationship.
The absence of conflict is usually not commensurate with integrity. Sometimes people have issues debating certain subjects; instead, they agree on some topics while allowing themselves to be flexible on others. In such cases, there is still conflict under the surface because both parties are holding back something important.
It's best when couples can discuss their differences openly and resolve them constructively, but even in very close relationships, there are sometimes things that one person doesn't want to talk about. If this is the case, it's best to be direct with each other instead of pretending like nothing is wrong.
The absence of conflict also indicates that one party is giving up too easily. It may be that he or she does not feel respected by his or her partner, so there is no need for this individual to put up a fight. Alternatively, it could be that the partner is asking for too much flexibility around certain issues without making any effort to change himself or herself.
Overall, a relationship is healthy when there is conflict between the partners. This shows that they are alive and open to changing things for the better.
Some couples prefer heated debates because it raises their hormone levels. Subconsciously, those individuals understand that fighting is only a manifestation of their passion, and that their dispute will result in an even more passionate makeup.
Others find strength in disagreement because they believe it helps them come to a consensus. They like knowing there's at least two ways of looking at something, which allows them to choose what's right for them.
Yet others enjoy arguments because they feel like they're being honest when they say they "love it." Fighting enables them to express their true feelings about one another instead of keeping secrets or pretending everything is fine when it isn't. It's also helpful for them to hear each other out without judgment, which leads them to think more critically about where they are with each other and what they can do to improve things.
The list goes on and on...arguing is fun because it can be done in so many different ways with many different people, and it doesn't have to be serious to be effective.